Diary+entry+2

Dear diary, I am so sorry that I was not able to write here for a week but I just did not have any time! My life is so complicated at the moment and I am so scared that Mona will find out about me and Chantal! I am going to meet with Francois today again because we are both so mad that the King fired Jaques Neckar! So we met with many other men at the market place to start a demonstration. We demonstrated because bred was so expensive that we had just one bread for two days and we were even more hungry than one week before! I was so happy that Mona did not want to come with me, because I asked Chantal to come with me and we had lots and lots of time together. The first thing I did was that I showed her to Francois. He was really impressed when he met her because he did not think that she looked so good. I really took that demonstration serious but I thought that Chantal was more important. After a while Chantal and I disappeared to a bush. An hour or so later I went back to Francois and I send Chantal home because I knew it was time to fight. When I turned around I saw one of the king’s soldiers putting his gun into Chantal’s direction and I run to rescue her; when I hustled her I noticed a pain on my right arm. I went to Francois to help him but when he saw my arm he took me to his praxis. When we went there he said that I should have told him before because now it is very late and maybe he has to cut my arm off. I was too shocked to see that he was laughing. Then I saw him laughing and I felt much better! Louis XVI is the worst king on earth because he does so many bad things to us and just because of him we have to fight for everything. I think that he should go and live in the Bastille and not we! I think that this whole demonstration and fighting does not help anybody! People should start to think about other people and not only themselves! My other problem that made me think about in the last week is the one with Chantal and Mona. I have to stay with Mona because I married her but I can not live without Chantal either. Now Mona wants to have children but do I want to have Children? Did anybody ask me? NO! Nobody did! I think I have to make a decision now. The time is coming. And I also think that I have to leave Chantal. If we stay together nobody will get happy. Because I will lose my job and maybe my life and if I will lose my life Mona will also be sad because then she would not have a husband. Nobody wants to be with a women that already had two husbands. And what about Chantal? She would miss me so much that she would probably die too! But if she would not die maybe somebody would find out about our “little” love affaire and tell everybody and then she would get hanged or even worse punishments. Nobody knows. Maybe I could just run away with her? But if we would get caught we both would definitely die. But then we would be together for ever. What it god would not forgive me for cheating on my wife? Then we would have to go to hell. Do I really want to risk that?

I just do not know what to do! If I ask Francois he just says the same things all over; again and again! If there is a god he should sent me a sign about what I should do!

( a sign come on Francois diary without him writing it )

Take Mona … What is that? A sign from god? Ok thank you so much for your help! I think I will not see Chantal again after telling her that I can not be with her anymore. Then most of my problems will be solved! Thank you god! Should we get kids? Should I stay with her for ever? Please answer God!

Yes and yes

I can really talk with god. I am so exited! And god also healed my wounds that I got from the fight today. I think that this diary has something magic!

Day 2 Today in the morning I told my wife that I also wanted to have children with her and then she replied that she did not think that I would ever agree of having children with her anymore. I saw in her face that she was so happy and that she really felt good with me and seeing her happy made me feel a bit better; but when I thought about what I had to do to my lovely Chantal I could not laugh anymore. I felt very sad I mean could you pretend that you could not see your love anymore? The only person that you can tell everything? I do not think that anybody could do that! But most of the people can chose who they would like to be with. God told me that I should take Mona so I do not have any time to lose and I have to stop that with Chantal and it did not make any sense because Chantal’s parents were rich and they had so much money and I was a normal lawyer with less money. Sometimes Chantal brought some bread for me but I never ate it I always kept it for Mona. Maybe that is a sign that I love Mona. But should I not feel the butterflies in my stomach? I think the reason I do not feel them is because I am so scared that I would lose her. I do not know. Well now I have to go back to work again. But I promise that I will write back again soon! I hope God will answer then again because he really helped me with one of the worst decisions that I had to do in my whole live. Well now I have to bring gyou to my secret place under the ground under my bed again because I think Mona should get tired soon ;). I feel so much better now.

Thank you for being the best diary in the whole world! Lots of love Francois